“We zijn zó gemakkelijk bereikbaar en toch zo alleen”

“In plaats van het moment te beleven met vrienden bij wie ik op dat moment was, deelde ik foto’s met mijn vrienden online. En het erge is: het viel me op dat bijna iedereen hetzelfde deed. Het is verbazend hoe normaal we het schijnen te vinden dat we ons leven leiden door onze smartphones”, zegt de 27-jarige Brit uit Sussex aan deredactie.be.

Omdat hij vroeger enkele muziekvideo’s heeft geregisseerd, besliste Turk om zelf een filmpje te maken waarin hij de internetgeneratie waarschuwt voor de donkere kant van sociale media. “Het is gek”, zegt hij, “dat we nooit zo gemakkelijk met elkaar in contact konden komen, maar dat we tegelijk zo eenzaam zijn. Dat is de boodschap die ik via mijn gedicht wil doorgeven.”

Uiteindelijk heeft het vier dagen geduurd om de (onderstaande) tekst van zijn gedicht neer te schrijven. Enkele passages zijn hard, maar tegelijk ook herkenbaar voor diegenen die zelf voortdurend naar de smartphone grijpen of vrienden hebben die dat doen.

Na de opnames zette hij het filmpje op zijn Facebookpagina. Vervolgens begonnen zijn Facebookvrienden zijn gedicht vlotjes te delen. Tegenover onze redactie geeft de 27-jarige man toe dat dit wel heel ironisch is.

“Maar de mensen voor wie mijn boodschap is bestemd, bevinden zich nu eenmaal op Facebook. De ironie is onvermijdelijk”, weet Turk, die vroeger achter de schermen werkte van humoristische tv-programma’s, maar nu volop timmert aan een carrière in de schrijvers- en filmwereld.

Zijn sociale media dan slecht? “Neen, natuurlijk niet”, klinkt het verrassend. “Ze kunnen ongelooflijk handig zijn om snel belangrijke dingen te delen of in contact te blijven met mensen bij wie dat zonder internet heel moeilijk zou zijn. Het is dus niet zo dat ik aan het preken ben tégen sociale media. Wel vind ik dat ze de levens van te veel mensen dicteren via hun smartphone of tablet. En daar wil ik iedereen voor waarschuwen”, besluit Gary Turk.

I have 422 friends, yet I am lonely.
I speak to all of them everyday, yet none of them really know me.

The problem I have sits in the spaces between,
looking into their eyes, or at a name on a screen.

I took a step back, and opened my eyes,
I looked around, and then realised
that this media we call social, is anything but
when we open our computers, and it’s our doors we shut.

All this technology we have, it’s just an illusion,
of community, companionship, a sense of inclusion
yet when you step away from this device of delusion,
you awaken to see, a world of confusion.
A world where we’re slaves to the technology we mastered,
where our information gets sold by some rich greedy bastard.
A world of self-interest, self-image, self-promotion,
where we share all our best bits, but leave out the emotion.

We are at our most happy with an experience we share,
but is it the same if no one is there.
Be there for you friends, and they’ll be there too,
but no one will be, if a group message will do.

We edit and exaggerate, we crave adulation,
we pretend we don’t notice the social isolation.
We put our words into order, until our lives are glistening,
we don’t even know if anyone is listening.

Being alone isn’t the problem, let me just emphasize,
that if you read a book, paint a picture, or do some exercise,
you are being productive, and present, not reserved or recluse,
you’re being awake and attentive, and putting your time to good use.

So when you’re in public, and you start to feel alone,
put your hands behind your head, and step away from the phone.
You don’t need to stare at your menu, or at your contact list,
just talk to one another, and learn to co-exist.

I can’t stand to hear the silence, of a busy commuter train,
when no one wants to talk through the fear of looking insane.
We’re becoming unsocial, it no longer satisfies
to engage with one another, and look into someone’s eyes.

We’re surrounded by children, who since they were born,
watch us living like robots, and think it’s the norm.
It’s not very likely you will make world’s greatest dad,
if you cant entertain a child without a using an iPad.

When I was a child, I would never be home,
I’d be out with my friends, on our bikes we would roam.
We’d ware holes in our trainers, and graze up our knees;
we’d build our own clubhouse, high up in the trees.

Now the parks are so quiet, it gives me a chill
to see no children outside and the swings hanging still.
There’s no skipping or hopscotch, no church and no steeple,
we’re a generation of idiots, smart phones and dumb people.

So look up from your phone, shut down that display,
take in your surroundings, and make the most of today.
Just one real connection is all it can take,
to show you the difference that being there can make.
Be there in the moment, when she gives you the look,
that you remember forever, as when love overtook.
The time you first hold her hand, or first kiss her lips,
the time you first disagree, but still love her to bits.

The time you don’t need to tell hundreds, about what you’ve just done,
because you want to share the moment, with just this one.
The time you sell your computer, so you can buy a ring,
for the girl of your dreams, who is now the real thing.
The time you want to start a family, and the moment when,
you first hold your baby girl, and get to fall in love again.
The time she keeps you up at night, and all you want is rest,
and the time you wipe away the tears, as your baby flees the nest.

The time your little girl returns, with a boy for you to hold,
and the day he calls you granddad, and makes you feel real old
The time you take in all you’ve made, just by giving life attention,
and how your glad you didn’t waste it, by looking down at some invention.
The time you hold your wife’s hand, and sit down beside her bed
you tell her that you love her, and lay a kiss upon her head.
She then whispers to you quietly, as her heart gives a final beat,
that she’s lucky she got stopped, by that lost boy in the street.
But none of these times ever happened, you never had any of this,
When you’re too busy looking down, you don’t see the chances you miss.

So look up from your phone, shut down those displays,
we have a finite existence, a set number of days.
Why waste all our time getting caught in the net,
as when the end comes, nothing’s worse than regret.

I am guilty too, of being part of this machine,
this digital world, where we are heard but not seen.
Where we type and don’t talk, where we read as we chat,
where we spend hours together, without making eye contact.

Don’t give in to a life where you follow the hype,
give people your love, don’t give them your like.
Disconnect from the need to be heard and defined
Go out into the world, leave distractions behind.
Look up from your phone, shut down that display,
stop watching this video, live life the real way.